At Rest

I saw you once again, but I knew it wasn't you. It was what I wanted you to be. What once was. It wasn't you at all. I stared full of confusion at you, and that beautiful smile. Haven't seen that in ages, seemed life in another life. I knew it wasn't real because you needed me, and told me everything would be okay. We had each other. I couldn't stop looking at you, and I didn't want to stop. I was looking at a mirage, a ghost.. just the thoughts of what once was. But.. I embraced this farce, like a child who has not seen a loved one in a while. I remember everything we did, which in reality was nothing. Just looked.. out across the broad wide world. This world.. that like you.. was a fake. I swear I could feel your heart beating as we embraced, it even skipped a beat. Raced a little like it used to. You whispered in my ear.. "You are amazing even in your weakest moments, do not allow your fears to stop you." I blinked, and you were farther away. Still that smile on your face, and you had your hand on your heart. Your eyes closed and you raised your arms... then you blew away like sand in the wind. I fell to my knees yelling "I hate you! I HATE YOU!" Those words just continued to fly out of my mouth as the last of you vanished. And now kneeling, I looked around.. at this place. This beautiful place you had left me in.. What was it? How did I not see this before? A few lights flashed, and I heard something that sounded like crashes of thunder. I felt heavy.. Soo.. heavy. I felt as though something was pulling me down towards the ground. Then I heard your voice again.. "I exist only where you want me to, and you know this.." I tried to fight the force dragging me down.. pulling so hard, it was too much for me to control. I lost. Flat, I lay against the ground.. I heard your voice again. "Be at peace with yourself, I will be with you always whenever you want.. whenever you need. Just come back to this place, and all you have to do is think of me. I will come." Laying there hearing that, it somehow soothed me.. I felt as though everything was okay. There was nothing in the world that I wanted to do more then to stand, but I was too comfortable.. it felt so right. Just then the voice returned but it was different this time, it sounded as if it was crying. The words came out in sobs.. "You're dreaming.."

Then I woke up.